Musical Wars
Chapter 14 -- Thickening Plots

“Ducks,” Spike nodded his head toward Cordelia when they walked through the door to the dim office. 

“Oh, don’t even come in here with that whole innocent act.  If you’re here to hit Angel again, you can just turn your over-bleached ass around and leave, mister.”

“You *hit* Angel,” Xander demanded, but Spike didn’t even have the grace to flinch.

“Wanker deserved it,” Spike smugly insisted.  “But I’ve got to talk to him, so the cheerleader needs to go get him.”

“And you,” Xander did flinch when Cordelia pointed a manicured finger at him.  “Exactly where were you last night?  I expect you to keep his unholy bleachiness in line.”  Xander swallowed and closed his eyes in an effort not to think about where he had been during Spike’s confrontation with his sire.  Spike’s snicker proved that the vampire had no trouble remembering the previous evening.

“Can’t really tell him what to do,” Xander pointed out with a glare to Spike who wouldn’t stop softly laughing. “Besides, I’ve learned my lesson about getting between Spike and Angel.”  Xander didn’t even think about what his words must sound like until he saw the instant worry on Cordelia’s face.

“Xander?  Are you okay?” she asked as she walked around the desk, a stake in hand.

“I’m fine, Cordie.  Just a piece of advice from experience—don’t try to pull a practical joke on a 120 year old vampire.  You won’t win.” He shrugged and Spike’s snicker, which had disappeared at the arrival of the stake, now returned.

“Whatever,” Cordelia waved a dismissive hand in their direction.  “I so don’t need to know what adolescent games you’ve been up to.”

“Who ya talkin’ to?” asked a voice from a back office and the green-eyed man, Doyle, walked out.  “Dinna know we were gettin’ regular visits or we’d a redecorated, maybe something in a nice cross motif,” Doyle commented as he leaned against the doorframe watching them.  Xander really wondered how ugly the confrontation had been the previous evening because everyone seemed on edge.  Well, everyone except Spike who had obviously caused the whole mess.

“We really do need to see Angel,” Xander hurried to say before Spike could offend them any more than he obviously already had.

“If he thinks he can walk in here whenever he wants, he’s gone in the head,” Doyle responded without moving.

“It’s all right,” came a voice from behind Doyle, and the man moved to allow Angel into the room.

“Well if it i'nt tall, dark, and broody,” Spike commented, and Xander felt himself pulled tighter into Spike’s side.  He resisted an urge to roll his eyes.

“Spike, I thought we agreed to keep our distance?” Angel asked as he moved into the room, taking a position in front of the desk where Cordelia sat and Doyle now leaned.

“Just thought you’d like a heads up, but if ya don’t want my help, I’ll just take my pet and get far enough away that we’ll be safe.”

“What are ya blatherin’ about now?” Doyle asked from his position behind Angel, and Spike released Xander in order to dig in the duster pockets for cigarettes.  Xander retreated to the arm of the sofa nearest the door.

Spike lit his cigarette and stood there, blowing smoke in Angel’s direction while Angel’s expression grew increasingly pained.

“William?” he finally demanded in a half snarl.

“Wot?  Just thought to tell ya that some bloody git got his hand on that mojo that Cassidy’d collected.  Thought you lot took care of that, but I guess good help’s hard to find,” Spike waved toward the desk, and Cordelia gave out an offended squeal.
 
“Jaysus,” Doyle swore.

 “Where did you hear this?” Angel demanded.

“Oi, you’d a heard too if ya stopped to talk to the fledges instead a pretendin’ ya can kill them all.  One of the older vamps set up shop on the north end, been gatherin’ minions and lettin’ the younger masters kill each other off as he sat back and chatted up those lawyers of Cassidy’s.”  The room fell into silence for several seconds.

“And why *exactly* did this minion trust you with this information?” Angel’s eyes narrowed, and Xander resisted an urge to beat both vampires until they stopped this inane game of who can piss higher.  It was like watching those stupid rams on National Geographic, the ones that rammed their heads together over and over until they proved who had the harder head.

“You really are playin’ on half a deck these days.  The minion trusted me ‘cause I’m a master or have ya forgottin’ how minions act the way you forgot your own childer?”  Xander sat up a little straighter, expecting the blows to start, but Angel wilted like a plucked flower.
“William,” he said in a far more conciliatory tone.

“Don’t bloody go there, Peaches.  Don’t want to have some wanker with mojo strong enough to bring me to heel runnin’ around.  I fought to get free a Darla, and I earned my status, so you can soddin’ help me take him down or not, but ya won’t treat me like some underling who hasn’t earned his place.”  This time the uncomfortable silence stretched far longer with the two vampires staring at each other.  Spike finally ended the stand off by walking to the door and flicking the remains of his cigarette onto the street.

“So, ya in or out?” Spike demanded from the door without turning around, his back to Angel in an expression of either submission or contempt, Xander really couldn’t tell which.  He could practically hear Angel grind his teeth, and that man was lucky he was a vampire; otherwise he might have a serious dental problem.  Angel finally spoke.

“Do you trust this minion?”

“He’s got no reason to lie.  Knows I’ll go back and torture him to death if he does.”  Spike stood motionless, no bouncing, no twitching a cigarette in his hand, no nothing.  The stillness made Xander nervous. 

“Do you know where this place is?”

“Yeah, Peaches, I do.”  Spike turned to face his sire, and now Angel was doing the silent and motionless bit.   This was just entirely too creepy.  He could see Cordelia and Doyle exchanging glances, so he wasn’t the only ones getting major wiggins.

“Cordelia, get the holy water,” Angel quietly ordered.

“You’ve got to be kidding.” Cordelia’s hand shot up to her waist as her eyes narrowed in rebellion.

“Cordelia, please just get the holy water.  Doyle, call Gunn and see if his crew can give us some support later tonight after we’ve checked this place out.”

“Hello?!?!  You’re talking about trusting the vamp that blind-sided you yesterday.  Can anyone here spell trap because I did not survive a hell mouth just to end up a vampire chew toy.”

“Cordelia,” Angel said wearily.

“T-R-A-P.  Pretty simple.”

“Cordelia.”

“Trap.  Ambush.  Snare.  Lure.  Con.”

“Cordelia.”

“Can I get in a word here, Angel?  ‘Cause I’m trying to make a point and I don’t think you’re listening.”

“He’s not lying.” Angel finally just started talking over Cordelia’s complaints, and she fell silent as he continued.  “We have to stop this vampire, and we have to get whatever magical objects he’s using.”

“And we’re trusting *Spike* on this?”  The second hand now rested on her hip giving her the outline of some ancient warrior… or an angry mother.  Scary either way.

“Yes, we are.  Doyle—phone.”  Angel now turned to completely face his own crew, and Doyle reached for the phone.  Cordelia’s hand landed on the handset before Doyle could pick it up and the man looked up at Angel helplessly.  Oh yeah, this wasn’t of the good.

“Gunn’s probably not going to be up to anything other than soft foods after yesterday anyway,” Xander said about three seconds before his brain reminded him that he didn’t really want to get into a discussion with Angel, certainly not in front of Spike who had gone a little extremeish last time he’d talked to Angel, certainly not when the topic included Spike’s whole secret plan with Ajani.

Angel swung back to face him, taking two steps toward their end of the room, and he could hear Spike sigh and shift closer to the couch where he sat.

“And I think I’m going back to the whole not talking thing—I get in less trouble that way,” Xander nervously laughed.

“What did you do to Gunn, William?” Angel spoke to Spike, but his eyes remained focused on Xander until Xander squirmed under the glare.

“Nothing.  Would of happily killed the wanker, but ended up pullin’ him out of a lair instead.  Not going to talk about it.”

“You saved Gunn?” Angel now turned to Spike, confusion pulling his brows into deep furrows.

“Nancy-boy thing to do, but yeah.  I did.  Enough said.”  Xander watched Angel’s eyes travel from him to Spike and back to him.  The vampire reached some sort of conclusion because his forehead smoothed out and he nodded knowingly. 

“He okay?” Xander didn’t realize that Angel was talking to him until Spike nudged him and he looked up to see Angel watching him intently.

“I guess.  He was strong enough to take me on a whole guilt trip, so I’m assuming that means he’ll live.”  He squirmed a bit talking to Angel, and the vampire must have realized it because he backed up a step or two, and Spike returned to his place leaning against the door.

“We’ll check the place out and see if we can handle it with the five of us,” Angel announced.

“Never do like this part of the plan,” Doyle complained but he followed Angel into the back and helped him carry out a large collection of weapons.



When they reached the building in question, Xander found himself agreeing with Doyle.  The place had once been some sort of utility station with thick concrete walls and wire towers and a steel door.  Hell, it might still be a utility station, but God help the utility worker who tried to go in there because vamps slipped in and out of the half-open door with regularity.

“They must have sewer access in there,” Angel commented as he lay on a small hill watching the facility.

“Ya think?” Spike sarcastically snapped back from the convertible.  He hadn’t liked coming in one vehicle with Angel and company, but the older vampire had insisted that Spike’s motorcycle with its missing muffler and throbbing engine was just a little too obvious.  So that left Spike and Xander in back with a very uncomfortable Doyle.  A particularly uncomfortable Doyle once Spike made it clear that he would sit in the middle and Doyle would not be anywhere near *his* Xander.

“Spike,” Angel snarled, but Xander was relieved that the older vampire had returned to using the nickname.  When Angel said “William,” he was reminded of his mother’s angry “Alexander Leville Harris,” and that was so not a good memory. The very sound of his full name still sent his manly bits retreating.

“What’s the plan?” Doyle asked from his position next to Angel, binoculars in hand.

“It better not include me getting down in the dirt with you two,” Cordelia called quietly, but she was also pulling weapons out of the trunk and sorting them by function:  crossbows with the stake throwers, maces with the swords.  Strange girl.  Dirt, no; weapons, yes.

“Right now, we wait and try to get an idea of how many are in there.”

Xander turned to see Spike gesturing to him, and he followed Spike away from the others toward a distant fence.

“Ya stay back in this, pet.  Don’t care what Peaches says, you’re mine and you’ll bloody well listen to me.” Spike didn’t even make eye contract with him, instead the vampire stared toward Angel.

“But what if—”

“Oi, no arguin’.  Peaches and I can take care of ourselves, and if it comes down to you or those two wankers that hang around Peaches, you’re worth more than them.”  Gold eyes flicked toward him before returning to study Angel.  Xander turned to watch the scene that fascinated Spike.  Cordelia leaned on the car flipping through a magazine while Doyle and Angel lay on the grass.

“It’s not really a matter of w—”

“If ya say one more word arguin’, you’ll soddin’ well stay in the lair until this nest is cleared out.  Got it?”  Xander felt his demon moving within him, pushing and urging him to obey.  Of course, he couldn’t really do much to help compared with Spike and Angel, so he nodded his agreement.

“Promise,” Spike ordered.

“You’d take my promise?  What about the whole 'supposed to lie' thing?” Xander asked.

“I’m supposed to lie.  You’re a bloody white hat; you don’t lie.  Not to me, pet.”

“I promise, Spike.”  Xander felt a heaviness in his mind and he wasn’t sure he would be physically able to break that promise.  “So no Ajani tonight at all?”  Xander whispered.

“Nope.”  Spike turned his head as if listening for something but obviously concentrating on Angel more than his current conversation.

“Kinda like him,” Xander commented, and when Spike shot him a disgusted look, he quickly amended his statement. “In a human-friend sort of way which is actually a little disturbing considering he’s a killer and I really shouldn’t like killers, well, except for the obvious…and I am so gonna shut up now.”

“Yeah, well I told ya not to get attached.  Masters from different lines don’t share well, so we won’t be goin’ back.”

“Why?” Xander suddenly feared that Spike might have done something.

“’Cause he’s master enough to not want me around.  ‘Sides, after we take care of this wanker, that only leaves two or three real masters in the city.  Ajani can either make a truce and carve out his own territory or he can try and take the city, don’t really give a rat’s arse one way or the other.”

“But the vampire war…my mother…my friends.”  Xander could hear his voice approaching girly altitudes, but he nearly panicked at the thought of Spike abandoning them and making him abandon them.

“Oi, told ya I’d get the city quiet, and I did.  With only a couple a masters, they’ll settle things traditional-like, so no more marauding minions.”

“Marauding minions,” Xander laughed nervously, “that sounds like a Gilbert and Sullivan musical.”

“Bloody hell, ya really are daft.”  Spike shook his head.  “Right, so let’s see what my wanker of a sire has planned.”  Spike started back toward the rest of the group, and Xander followed.  He appreciated that Spike didn’t want him to get hurt, but when Spike had left him to take care of himself with Ajani’s minions, it had felt so good.  Just knowing that someone didn’t see him as the pathetic one, the loser, the demon-bait oaf made him happy.  Now Spike had with one sentence relegated him back to sidekick land.  Even worse, by forcing the promise out of him, he knew his own demon would fight to enforce it.  Xander stopped obsessing when Spike turned and gave him a confused expression right before reaching the others.

“Pet?” he asked softly.

“I’m fine,” Xander answered quickly and then walked by Spike to lean next to Cordelia.

“Any plan then?” Spike pulled cigarettes out of his duster and started toward Angel.  When he got high enough on the hill, he crouched down so that the guards at the door below wouldn’t see him.

“A friend a mine has access to some city plans.  He’s bringin’ blueprints now,” Doyle offered.  Xander watched as Doyle slid closer to Angel, and he had to suppress a smile.  Everyone else reacted to Spike as if he were a killer, and yes, he actually was a killer, but Xander could see the nervous bounce that revealed his desire to *do* something.  He watched the cigarette and knew that Spike was uncomfortable and trying to put on his ‘Big Bad’ personality.  He listened to the accent thicken and suspected that Spike was upset about the coming fight.  The longer he knew the vampire, the more he understood his moods, but he just wished he could find the button to push to make the vampire trust him.


Xander hadn’t come to any conclusions an hour later when a new car arrived and Doyle met with some man, the two of them leaning over a laptop computer and a pile of blueprints weighted down with small rocks.  He’d had no idea that fighting evil could be so boring and had even resorted to Cordelia’s magazines.  Doyle, Angel, and the new guy talked and pointed while Spike offered a couple of comments that the others obviously dismissed if he was reading body language right.

“Don’t you ever get bored?” Xander asked Cordelia one article about pores and two boyfriend quizzes later.  They had moved to the backseat.

“He pays; I sit,” Cordelia waved a dismissive hand toward Angel as she continued to read. 

“But is it always like this?”

“On good nights, yes.  On bad nights, there’s more slime.”

“Wow, I just thought fighting for truth and justice would be more…interesting.”  Xander threw the magazine down and looked over at the conferencing trio and hovering Spike.

“Is that what you’re fighting for?” Cordelia asked in a suddenly serious tone.

Xander watched Spike animate an argument with a cigarette flick and a quick flash of game face.  Doyle retreated, but the new guy ignored the antics.  He wasn’t near enough to hear, but he placed good odds that Angel had either just called Spike ‘William’ or sighed heavily.  “What?” he finally asked when he realized Cordelia had asked a question.

“Truth and justice, is that what you’re fighting for?” she sighed in obvious frustration at his inattentiveness.  Xander looked over to find Cordelia’s magazine forgotten in her lap and a far too serious expression on her face.

“Um…yeah?” 

“Interesting choice in partners then,” Cordelia’s gaze slipped over to Spike, but then it returned to pin him to the car seat.

“I’m not gonna sit here and fight with someone who also hangs out with a vampire.”

“Mine has a soul,” she shot back.

“And I’m really sick of hearing that.  Does that somehow change who he is?  He’s still a vampire, you know.”  Xander tried to keep his voice down, but when he glanced over at the group, Spike now stood staring directly at him, ignoring the other three.  Oh yeah, overprotective mode in five…four…three…

“He’s evil,” Cordelia nearly hissed in a good imitation of a vampire herself.  “You can tell yourself whatever you want, but he’s evil.”

“And how exactly would you know that?”

“Sunnydale born here.  I grew up around evil.  I saw what Angel did when his soul went MIA, and it wasn’t pretty.  There were dead fish involved.”  Xander narrowed his eyes in confusion, wondering if he had missed something because he thought she had just said dead fish.

“You’re worried about the fish of the world?”

“I’m worried about how long you can keep Spike on a leash.”

“No leash here.”  He held up his empty hands.

“You really are an idiot, aren’t you?  You know, when I first saw you, I thought about calling Willow.  You know, telling her I’d found you because she really worried when she tried to call you back after your little fight and found out your phone had been disconnected.  But I didn’t know how to explain all these changes in your life: the gay thing, the pet thing, the sleeping with the undead thing.  Now I realize that you haven’t changed at all.  You were a moron then and you’re a moron now.”  Xander sat open-mouthed and speechless as he tried to scrape up enough dignity to even reply.

“You were a bitch then and you’re a bitch now.”  Xander was proud of himself; he didn’t babble, stutter, or cry even though he had an urge to do all three.

“A bitch who tells the truth,” Cordelia instantly announced in a regal tone.  “That vampire would happily eat us, but he plays nice while you’re around.  So what happens when he gets tired of you or you try to find whatever life a *person* like you considers normal?  Hell-lo, he’s going to go binge on the local population because he’s not the cute and fuzzy you seem to think he is.”

“And he’s not what you think either,” Xander growled back.  He struggled to keep his voice low since technically they were still on stake out.  “He isn’t Angel.  He never ate his family.  He never tried to kill every person who knew him as a mortal.  Angelus was a sick bastard who got off on other people’s pain; Spike just *is*, so don’t compare them.”  Wow lame ending on that argument, but then he didn’t really expect to win against Cordelia.

“And how do you think he got that name?  His pathetically outdated hair?”

“I know all about the railway spikes he used,” Xander snapped back, but he had to admit he was disturbed by Spike’s story of torturing people, one he’d heard shared with a demon over a drink while Xander knelt on the floor by the vampire’s side.

“And you’re okay with that?”  Cordelia demanded.  Xander thought of Angel and Spike in the office, facing off with one vampire claiming the mantle of “goodness” and “honor” and the other vampire just wanting the respect of his sire.  Suddenly a piece slipped into place and Xander realized that he was okay with Spike’s past.

“I’m fine with his past because he did that to impress your boss. Angel is his sire, and he wanted to prove that he was just as strong, so if he did things that were evil, I’m blaming Angelus.  As for him being a vampire, deal with it.”

“My god, you really do love him.” Cordelia’s sharp tone mutated into wonder and a soft wistfulness so quickly that Xander felt like he had just jumped realities and landed in a new conversation.

“I…Um…Okay, lost now.  You’re supposed to do the bitchy thing and then I do the whole defensive thing, and don’t go changing the rules on me mid-fight.”

“I still think you’re stupid,” she shrugged, “but you just keep in mind that Spike’s only playing well with others because instead of trying to impress Angelus, he’s trying to impress you.  I suggest that if you ever want to break up you hire a whole lot of bodyguards and give the rest of us enough warning to update our security.”

“And again with the comparing him to Angel.  There’s no comparison.”  Xander stood up and stepped over the side of the car onto gravel path.  He’d expected to find Spike waiting in full game face ready to eat Cordelia.  Instead both vampires and the new guy—car and all—had disappeared.  Doyle leaned against the base of a cable pole, and Xander stomped toward the man.

“Where’s Spike?” he asked when he got close enough to ask without raising his voice.  Alerting the entire nest of vampire’s on the other side of the hill didn’t fit in with their plans…if they’d actually formed a plan yet.

“Spike had an anger management issue; he and Angel went back of the shed there,” Doyle nodded toward an old wood shack, and Xander altered direction without another word. 

What right did Cordelia have to question him?  Her comment about Spike getting tired of him hit a sore spot, but he didn’t think for one minute that she was right about Spike being a sadistic killer like Angelus.  Spike killed to eat, which technically people did too.  Every sick and twisted story Spike told had either Angelus or Darla in it.  Every person he raped had been next to Angelus, and now that Xander thought about it, Spike had described the violence with great detail and joy, but he had described Angelus’ reaction in even more detail.  Spike was a vampire with a demon’s sense of family and love and honor, but that didn’t mean he was a monster…okay, it did mean he was a monster, but that didn’t make him less of a person or maybe just not less of an individual.

Xander was shaking his head at his own mental confusion when he turned the corner of the shed and stopped dead.  Spike’s back was up against a pole, Angel’s body trapping the smaller vampire, which didn’t actually surprise Xander.  The surprise came from Angel’s mouth locked over Spike’s neck, and Spike in full game face buried in Angel’s neck.  The sounds of drinking and moaning were unmistakable and Xander felt himself react to the raw lust he could practically smell. 

Holy shit, what memo had he missed?  Yes, he expected to get replaced eventually, but this was a little more than he was prepared to deal with.  Part of him gasped to breathe through the agony, and another part of him panted at the basic animal desire swirling around him.  He must have made some noise because both vampires stopped, Angel stepping back and dropping into human features so fast that Xander thought for a moment that he hadn’t seen the ridges at all.

“I told you he could handle Cordelia,” Angel said calmly even though he had an even more guilty expression than usual.

“I wouldn’t say handled as much as got verbally ripped apart before retreating,” Xander said as he stepped forward carefully.  If he was about to be rejected and destroyed, he wasn’t sure he wanted to be much closer, but he couldn’t seem to stop his feet.

“With Cordelia, you count yourself successful any time you can walk away from the fight with both your wallet and your manhood in place.”  Okay, Angel told a joke.  He still looked guilty, but he told a joke.  Xander looked over toward Spike, looking for some reassurance, but the blond vampire had turned away, leaning a shoulder against the pole with cigarette smoke rising above his head.

“Um, I’m not sure about the manhood thing,” Xander admitted as he stepped closer.

“I’ll go make a few last minute checks,” Angel answered and then the large vampire actually managed to run toward the car.  Actually, he was probably just running away, but Xander appreciated his ability to make the move look work related.

“Spike?” Xander called, unsure how to handle the moment.  He knew that technically he was the pet and Spike the master, so the vampire probably had a right to go sucking on and lusting after others, but that didn’t make him feel any less inadequate.  God, he had felt like the loser when compared to Luther, so he sure as hell couldn’t compare to Angel.  What if Spike wanted to get rid of him?  He couldn’t blame Spike for preferring Angel, and if he had to, he’s share just to not get left behind.  But what if Spike didn’t want Angel in addition to him, what if Spike wanted Angel instead of him?  And why wasn’t Spike interrupting his internal panic with some sort of comforting comment, even if it was a disturbing sort of comfort.

“Do you want me to leave?” he asked.

“Yeah, be there in a bit, pet.”  Xander’s chest physically hurt so much at that first word, that he almost didn’t hear the rest.

“Will you?” He had to know.  He couldn’t live with this fear.

“Wot?”  Spike turned and he saw the tilted head and funny wrinkle that always appeared when Spike got confused.

“Will you be…” Xander took a deep breath trying to control his breathing, his fear, his pain.  Suddenly strong arms locked around his waist, and he swore he never even saw Spike move.

“’S’all right luv.  It’s a sire thing, a way of makin’ things…” Spike’s words stopped as the vampire struggled to explain something that he obviously hadn’t tried to explain in words before.

“You need to be okay with your sire. I get that,” Xander answered as the pain tightened until he wondered if he could actually die of grief.  “It’s okay, I never expected you to…”

“Oi, we’re makin’ a right mess of this,” Spike complained and Xander could almost pretend to be okay listening to that almost normal voice as strong arms held him.  “Not giving ya up, pet.  You’re mine and ya stay mine.”  The words sunk into his heart, loosening the bands around his chest.

“But you want him,” Xander stated calmly.  Funny because inside he was running around and wailing.

“Want my sire, want one of my sires.  Want to hunt with them or share a warm lover with them.  Want to have a place in the clan, that’s all.”

“And Angel can give you that?” Xander asked.

“Yeah.  Sometimes feels like someone’s crushin’ my soddin’ chest, knowing I’ve been rejected by the whole bloody line.”  Xander knew the feeling.  He may not have a line with a whole hierarchy of vampires to reject him, but the rejection of the one vampire that meant everything to him?  He wasn’t sure he’d survive that.

“It’s okay if you’d rather have him,” Xander whispered because he had to fight to even get the words past his lips.

“If I have to chose, I’ll choose you every time,” Spike said fiercely, and the arms tightened until Xander could feel the circulation cut off.

“He can give you things I can’t; he can give you family.”

“And I’ll rot in Dru’s bloody hell dimension before I let myself in for that grief again,” Spike said, and Xander felt a face nuzzle at his neck.  He happily tilted his head and Spike’s tongue played with the scar.

“I chose you, Xander.  You’re the one I want, and I didn’t mean ya to see that.  That was just a sire’s way of letting childer know things are okay.”

“That’s a vampire *hug*?” Xander asked, unsure if the raw emotion he’s witnessed could really be compared to a hug.

“Sorta.  Doesn’t matter, though because it’s not anything that changes what we have.  Like you once told me, not going to start chasing the broody Neanderthal.  But we gotta take care of this master or both us vampires’ll end up serving some bleedin’ little runt.  Besides, you don’t want your precious Ajani comin’ up here, ‘cause the info Doyle’s buddy brought, it shows some bad mojo goin’ on.”  Xander could hear Spike practically begging him to let it go and let things return to normal.  He smiled.

“The little runt’s mojo isn’t nearly as bad as these two bad-ass vampires I know.”  Xander allowed Spike to guide him back to where the others waited, but he couldn’t pretend away one simple truth that now colored his whole world.  Spike needed something that he couldn’t give him, at least not without giving up his humanity.


Xander knew he was obsessing when Angel covered the attack plan, but then he didn’t really need to listen.  He could sit and watch the others while he thought about things like life and death and families and how screwed he was because he would never be enough for anyone in his life.  Cordelia and Doyle would dust any vampire’s fleeing out of the building. They expected a few fledges might decide to run for it, but most would stay to protect their master.  Spike and Angel would attack from the sewers shortly before sunrise when the vampires were full and tired.  Since most of the minions were young and still undisciplined, both vampires insisted that they could clear out most of the nest with no trouble. 

Of course Spike had been absolutely gleeful once he discovered that Cordelia had packed his new favorite toy:  a flamethrower.  Angel had rolled his eyes and begged Spike to please remember that they were just as flammable as the fledges, but Xander could see how much more friendly the two were now.  It hurt him because it just reminded him what he couldn’t give Spike.  He did have to admire Angel’s crew though.  The plan had no more come out of Angel’s mouth before they started moving into place.  Of course he got the all-important job of guarding the car.  He had to say that in an entire history of being left behind, this excuse was the flimsiest. 

At least that’s what he said that until he discovered himself surrounded by fledges all alone at the convertible.  The first two he easily tricked into overextending themselves, slipping a stake in at the right angle to turn the guys to dust.  The problem came when three of them jumped him at once.  He dealt with blue shirted one in front of him, but that left two others free to grab his arms and wrench the stake from his hand.  He tried going into hand-to-hand combat mode, but that only lasted the three seconds it took the vampire holding his left hand to twist it up behind his back.  Before he could really even think about what a screw up he truly was, he found himself marched down the hill toward Doyle and Cordelia, a knife at his neck and a vampire at each arm.

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